Zippy Okoth: Beauty and Brains
Getting to interview a very busy Zippy Okoth was such an adventure, but we are glad we can finally feature her on Virtue is Possible. We asked her all the questions you told us to ask, as well as a few of our own, and we found out that she is beautiful and strong, well-achieved and yet humble, inspired and inspiring, loved and in love, lots of fun. Without any further ado, I present to you:
For any Yakuti readers who might not know who you are, please tell us a little about yourself.
I’m a 27-year-old Kenyan, married to Richard Dede and mother of one boy, Zuriel Dede. I am a performing artist of dance, music and drama. I am a lecturer at Kenyatta University in the department of Theatre Arts and Film Technology- School of Visual and Performing Arts and I am pursuing my PhD in Theatre Arts.
I was brought up in the humble town of Homa Bay in Western Kenya, being the eldest in a family of seven children. My parents [are] both Christians, my father a lawyer and my mother a businesswoman. I went to Sango Academy, then to Asumbi Girls High School and later to Maseno University where I did a BA in Drama and Theatre Studies and graduated in 2005 with First Class Honours and proceeded to University of Nairobi to do an MA in Gender and Development Studies, graduating in 2008.
I am passionate about Youth Issues and I give talks especially to High School Students on issues of Love and Sex, Career Choices, Reproductive Health and Building a Positive Self Esteem.
I love to be happy, sharing moments with family and friends, cooking, watching movies and performing.
You are a university lecturer, singer, speaker, wife, and recently a mother – congratulations again! And you’re not even 30 yet! What is the secret to being an achiever at such a young age?
I credit it all to God. I never thought I could be this at this age, and somehow I never feel it because I am doing what I love and that is theatre. Performance is my life and my great joy. I lecture theatre arts which I love with passion. Singing and Pubic speaking is also performance, thus all these are co-related. Being a wife is my full time job, the rest are part time. And through God’s grace I am now a mother, which is the biggest responsibility anyone has ever bestowed on me.
I’m also grateful to my mother and father who are such an inspiration to me and keep telling me to aim higher and that I can be anything I want in the face of this earth, and to my husband who has never ever stopped me from attaining the highest achievements despite ‘African sentiments on ambitious women’. My husband has given me a shoulder to lean on, he is my dearest friend and greatest critic, which challenges me to even dream bigger.
Above all, I think its all about asking God in faith and working hard towards that goal that you want to achieve. I remember there have been lots of times when I felt like God was not answering my prayers, yet after a period, most often when I have lost hope in getting something, God opens a way that is even greater than what I asked him for.
What is an average day in Zippy’s life? How has this changed since you now have a new “boss” [Zuriel]?
I wake up at 6.30am, pray, exercise for fifteen minutes then shower and groom myself. I have breakfast, watch a programme on TV until 9am then go to work (when I have lectures to facilitate). I study for 2 hours daily, either doing research for my PhD or teaching material. I’m home by 7pm, I sleep for an hour, call friends and family, shower, have dinner, watch TV, study and sleep at midnight. On weekends I make time to be with my family, no books, no internet at all at all.
Since I had my new boss, so much has changed! I cannot keep to any schedule at all except to attend meetings and lectures (we’ve got to pay bills!). Otherwise, I still study for two hours daily and my morning routine is still much the same. I call friends and family twice a week. Outings with my husband are shortened, we don’t stay out late like we used to. I am like an ambulance, ready for an emergency anytime.
How has music shaped the woman that you are today?
Music has given me a voice, confidence and a self esteem beyond compare. As I grew up through primary and secondary, everyone, teachers and students included, used to make fun of my deep big voice. Being in a girl’s only school it was ridiculous to hear a teacher say “Are there men in this class?” It was until I joined University that my lecturer Otumba Ouko gave me a singing role in a play, insisting I could sing and that I should stop listening to people. He was right because the audience loved my voice. I was amazed! With Professor Okumu’s help, I learned to sing better and together with other students and staff we formed The Maseno University Band, where I was the lead vocalist until I left in 2005.
I believe in turning your weaknesses into strengths. I may not be the best today, but when I keep my heart to doing something, I will achieve it at all costs. Music has made me believe that all is possible. I am a role model to a lot of young girls in my home town. I feel flattered when approached by young girls asking me what to do to be great singers, and I tell them to work hard and to believe in themselves. No one can believe in you if you do not believe in yourself thus it all starts from within oneself.
Many of the songs you sing would be considered secular; however, from the song “Singedhani,” we derive that you are born again. How would you explain/defend your secular music to the Christian community?
My secular music is what I believe every person, Christian or not would derive a teaching from because I sing about everyday happenings, the social ills and love for one another. My music is not dirty, and can be comfortably listened to with people of all ages sitting together. My love songs are about the beauty of pure love, of marriage and how we are a blessing to each other.
I often say, let’s be practical Christians. We live in a society where we cannot ignore the community around us. When we see ills and wrongs taking place, as Christians we have to be like the voice in the wilderness. Each of us has the ability to use their talents and gifts to change the society. If I have to praise God each day, I have to speak for that woman who is battered and cannot attend church service because her husband is abusing her. I have to speak for that person who is so helpless and hopeless because they are raped, forced into marriage, or abused in any form, so that they can be free of all this pain and serve God without fear. It is until we are free indeed that we can fully serve God with all our might.
A person who is in pain, can only serve God in the hope that all the pain will go away soon. But when we are free of pain, then we are able to praise and exalt God’s name and be of influence to others to serve God too. I have been through moments of turmoil and as much as it drew me even closer to God, I still believe when we are happy, we serve God better.
You sing about love and social issues. Are your love songs derived from your own experiences?
Most of my songs are derived from my experiences and of those who are close to me.
How do you handle mistakes during performances?
I just tell the audience, mistakes are human. There was this time, my voice was getting very dry on stage and I was having a bout of flu. I just told the audience, “This microphone is playing games with me and I cant blame it because it is made by man, and everything made by man has mistakes, let me give it a rest before we continue.” I then paused and took some water as the band continued to play the instruments. Thank God I do live band shows; the band just goes on.
What is the biggest thing you hope to achieve with your music?
I hope that someday, someone will come up to me and tell me that listening to my music changed their life, gave them hope and strength to move on, to find the energy within and to realize their potential. I hope that my music will touch people’s life one at a time and to make them realize it’s all possible through God, if only we believe and ask God for help.
You are passionate about social issues, especially sexual violence and child abuse. What would you say to someone who comes to you and says he or she was abused as a child and is seeking healing?
I would tell them “You are not to blame for what happened to you. What happened, has happened and you have to forgive your offender so as to move on. You should not hate or blame your parents or guardian either. Life has to go on and as much as you cannot forget, forgive him and ask God to forgive the person. Also ask God to open a way for that person to either stop abusing others or pray that the person gets arrested and punished for sexual abuse.
You look beautiful in red lipstick. What is the one make up item that you cannot leave the house without?
Lipstick. My mother says, the brighter the colour, the younger you look. Lol! I don’t know how true this is but I can’t bring myself to wearing dark coloured lipstick.
A little bit about your personal life: how did you get born again?
Through Hope FM, during Wambui Mburu’s show in 2007. I then rededicated my life to God in church in April 2008 at Ruaraka Baptist Church where I fellowship to-date. You know this verse about don’t be ashamed of the Lord or the father in Heaven will also be ashamed of you? That is the verse that made me step forward, with courage I walked to the front and the pastor’s wife held my hands as I gave my life to God. Life was even harder after that because I did not know what to give up about my life and what to carry on with. I prayed every time about everything because I was so scared of loosing my faith and most of all of being seen by other Christians as not being of faith.
With time, through the guidance of my bible study group, I got to start understanding how to walk in the Lord, I am still learning though. Each day I become a better person, and even when I fault in my steps, my conscience warns me. Most of all, being born again has really, really helped me in my marriage, its impossible to accept someone fully and unconditionally while yet forgiving and forgetting without God. God is amazing. Each day I learn something new about God.
Describe the three happiest moments of your life thus far?
The day I graduated with my Bachelors. My father came for my graduation and I hugged him. I don’t come from a hugging family and to me this was a great gesture of love from my father. Something I only remember doing when he visited me in school once in Form One.
The day I gave birth and held my son in my arms, looking into those big eyes and seeing God’s miracle and blessing. He was so delicate, so innocent, so sweet, I held him so close I slept with him and refused the nurses from taking him away from me. I wanted to watch him and I kept pulling his fingers so he could jerk so I [could] be sure he was breathing. I called him Zuriel (Hebrew for God is my rock).
The day I boarded a plane for the first time. I had told myself that 2007 would not end without me boarding a plane even if I was just going to Kisumu town. I had been saving for this adventure. Then came this peer educator’s training workshop I had to attend in Uganda and they booked us into flights. I called everyone at home and told them how excited I was, I even bought a new suitcase for boarding the flight. Funnily, when inside the plane, I didn’t feel any difference from being in a comfortable bus. I have since traveled by plane to Europe (Germany).
The day I got married, legally. I can remember saying my vows as I cried and laughed until I choked. My best maid, Salome, whispered to me “Zippy stop laughing, these vows are serious,” but I just couldn’t hold myself, I don’t know where all that flow of emotions came from. I was choking with laughter and my eyes were draining wet. Lol! I married the love of my life.
What about the three saddest moments?
Every time I part from my husband when he is going to be away for a long period of time like three months or more, I cry. Even though we communicate and talk everyday, I can’t help but cry.
The times when my father was hospitalized for severe coma for four months in 2001. He had suffered stroke, and his life was saved because of immediate alertness. He is now just being treated for hypertension and is so much alive and strong you would never know he was once in a severe coma. I praise God for his loving goodness.
The day my husband was hijacked by robbers. We were supposed to go to the clinic at 3pm and he had just called at 1.30pm to tell me he was on his way. I waited until 6pm and when tracking the car on the computer, I realized the car was in Mathare Valley. I couldn’t sleep. I called all the police I could and told them where the car was and they did not do a thing, they kept telling me there was no incident reported the whole evening and night. I couldn’t sleep, I cried and prayed all night, and in the morning I called a taxi friend and with the car track device we traced where he was and got him in the car blindfolded not knowing where he was. He was safe and not hurt at all but all the money he had was gone.
I know it’s God’s miracle for saving all the people in my life.
How did you meet your husband? What is it about him that made you decide to forsake all others?
He saw me on a magazine cover in 2004 and fell in love with ‘the girl on the magazine’. Lol. He kept the magazine and four months later, coincidentally his cousin, who was my former classmate, said he knew me. They struggled and got my number through a connection of other friends. One year later after much pestering from him I decided to go on a date with him and from there I can’t tell much, we are still together.
I think he was the most patient man I ever met because he asked me for a date persistently for a year without loosing hope. He is also very humble, hardworking, respects me as a person, and he encourages me to pursue greater heights. Most of all I believe he loves me and I love him.
What is the biggest risk you have ever taken, and did you regret it?
Travelling by taxi at night in August 2007 from Jinja Uganda to Busia Kenya border to meet my boyfriend, currently my husband. I was facilitating training on reproductive health and peer education in Uganda and my husband (then boyfriend) was due to leave Kenya in two days’ time to go to Germany where I would see him next in four months. I finished facilitating at 6pm, got to my hotel room, called a taxi and we reached Busia border at 10pm, we ate and talked all night and at 4am I crossed the border on foot and got into my Uganda taxi and was back to Jinja at 8am to facilitate the training.
I don’t regret it at all. My husband is the love of my life and I thank God everyday we are together.
What would you say if a young woman walked up to you just now and said, “Zippy, I want to sing!”
I would tell them to follow their heart. I would also tell them not to do it for fame but for the love of singing and I would ask them to think deeply of the message in their songs.
How about if someone said, “I want to quit school!”
Education is still important no matter what profession one is in or the fear of lack of jobs. Education gives one access to information, gives one confidence and positive self esteem.
What is your definition of a virtuous woman?
One who earns the respect of others by how she behaves and interacts, a role model to other women.
What is your favorite scripture, and why?
Philippians 2:14 “Do everything without complaining or arguing” (Good News Bible). As a woman I need this reminder constantly. It helps me have peace coz arguments may make us say hurtful words and it wastes time to complain instead of starting to work.
What big things should we look out for from Zippy?
Before I turn 45, I hope to be the first woman Professor of Theatre in Kenya, and then to be a UN ambassador and a member of the UN Secretariat in Africa.
I also hope to release more music albums with messages that will touch people’s lives.
Other dreams will be surprises to me and to everyone else. Sometimes, God’s plans are not our plans, he sees far ahead than we do.
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First woman professor of Theatre in Kenya, UN ambassador, member of the UN Secretariat… impossible? I think not! Let’s keep Zippy in our prayers, ladies!
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I enjoyed reading this, very inspiring. Her love story is amazing , the girl on the magazine. Zippy keep up the good work.
great story i loved it !!!