“Ugly” Fiancé
Hi Pea
I read your article on We Gotta Sample Before We Buy with a couple of girlfriends and they thought you were wrong about not being able to tell a man’s size (I guess they haven’t heard of Velcro straps or those men who stuff things in their swimsuits or underwear?). Anyway we got to arguing about other things , superficiality and what not and we started talking about attraction. I’m engaged to a man who is wonderful to me but not really good looking. My friends tease me about it a lot. I’ve always wanted to have beautiful babies – my parents made the perfect “combination” and had five very beautiful girls, me and my sister. I always wanted the same to happen to me but nowadays I look at my boyfriend and think what if we have children who are not attractive won’t they hate us for it or be teased or things like that? And will I still be attracted to this man years from now? My friends call him ugly already – point blank to my face! So will he also gradually become ugly to me?
Suubi.
Thanks for your candid question, Suubi… and thanks for visiting.
Congratulations on your engagement!
What right does anyone have to call God’s creation “ugly”?
At the end of the day, it really does not matter what your friends think. I am sure there are inner qualities that drew you to your fiancé. Looks fade, so it is very probable that he has simply given the handsome men a headstart in the attractiveness department. Give these “gorgeous” men a few more years and they, too, will catch up. Paul assures us in 2 Corinthians that the outward man is perishing day by day (2 Cor 4:16). Nothing in this realm lasts forever.
I believe you will get beautiful babies, even if they are unattractive outwardly. Every mother that I know thinks of her children as beautiful. This is actually not something you should preoccupy yourself with. There are “combinations” that actually work out wonderfully and yours might be one of them. And there are some that are initially thought to be perfect but the children are not as attractive as the parents. Your children will not hate you if you train them up in the way they should go, committing their attitudes and moral values to God. Choose to see your fiancé as God sees him. To answer your last question, I get the feeling he will become more attractive to you every day of your marriage.
I would urge you to set your mind on things above, and not things on the earth (Colossians 3:2).
Shalom!
Check out these similar posts:
Recent Comments